You Are Too Old for BDSM When...
- Sensory deprivation is when your Dom hides your hearing aid batteries.
- Your nipple clamps have training wheels.
- Edge play is standing by the microwave with a pacemaker.
- When you tell your sub to get the cane, you have to specify "walking" or
- You can't tell the difference between your tattoos and your age spots.
- You shout "One, two, three, CLEAR!" for electrical play.
- Your idea of breath play is when your wheelchair runs over your oxygen
- Your idea of suspension is an UltraLiftTM bra.
- You hold the paddle and say, "You're younger than me.... back into the
- Age play really is 24/7.