You Know You're a High Tech Worker If...
- You sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies.
- Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro.
- Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.
- Your company logo on your badge is applied with stick-um.
- When someone asks about what you do for a living, you lie.
- You learn about your layoff on CNN.
- Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose your best jokes.
- Your supervisor hasn't the ability to do your job assignment.
- You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.
- Salaries of the members on the Executive Board are higher than all the
Third World countries' annual budgets combined.
- Your home phone has none of the features you developed cuz you're never there.
- It's dark when you drive to and from work.
- Fun is when issues are assigned to someone else.
- Communication is something your group is having problems with.
- You see a good looking person and know it is a visitor.
- A tie is hanging in your cube.
- Free food left over from meetings is your main staple.
- Weekends are those days your spouse makes you stay home.
- Being sick is defined as can't walk or you're in the hospital.
- You work 200 hours for the $100 bonus check and jubilantly say "Oh wow, thanks!"
- All real work gets started after 5pm or on weekends.
- Everyone fights fires (i.e. problems).
- Dilbert cartoons hang outside every cube.
- Plants in your cube are healthier than your plants at home.
- Your boss' favorite lines are "when you get a few minutes," "in your spare time," "when you're freed up," and "I have an opportunity for you."
- 10% of the people you work with -- no one (boss included) knows what they do.
- Vacation is something you rollover to next year or a check you get every January.
- Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers" or "does something with telephones."
- Change is the norm.
- Nepotism is encouraged.
- You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting.
- You read this entire list and understood it.