• Talking dirty in bed means shouting obscenities when he hogs the blanket.
• Chivalry's as dead as the door he lets slam in your face.
• PMS lasts all month.
• Your jumbo box of absorbent maxi-pads is on open display.
• "Honey, what are you thinking?" is now "Are you finished yet?!"
• He yawns when you bitch about that guy hitting on you at work.
• Dildos, S & M, menage ... anything to break the monotony.
• You used to walk hand in hand, now you run to keep up.
• Those frilly, lacy, tiny panties have become way too uncomfortable.
• Two weeks no orgasm.
• Three weeks no orgasm ... and you still don't miss it.
• When he lends you five bucks, he expects it back.
• You'd rather spend quality time with your vibrator.
• The way he breathes is getting on your nerves.
• You let one rip in your sleep and don't care if he hears.